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Author Archives: Mark Charney
Charney’s Codification: Prohibitive Perfectionism
This being that most wonderful time of the year, I was at the shopping mall searching for that perfect gift. A few weeks previously, my wife had informed me of her interest in a new leather handbag and gave me … Continue reading
Posted in Business Communication, Satire, Uncategorized
Tagged eponymous law, Macy’s, Murphy’s Law, Nordstrom, Parkinson’s Law, Peter Principle, Plato, Victoria’s Secret
1 Comment
Female Foreign Nationals: A Good Time to Discuss?
I have long been irritated by emails from females from Russia, Southeast Asia, and Eastern Europe: women offering to travel to meet me and promising matrimony if I turn out to be a nice guy. If they had done their … Continue reading
Posted in Satire, Uncategorized
Tagged California girls, deportation, Donald, Eastern European, foreign national, golddigger, Hispanic, hunky, immigrant, Ivana, Marla Maples, Melania, Mexican, Muslim, normative discontent, Polish nose, Politics, Russian, Slav, Trump, Vladimir Putin
2 Comments
A Guiding Light for Baltimore
Anyone who has followed the news in Baltimore this year knows that we have been a city in turmoil. After the death of Freddie Gray, allegedly at the hands of several of our city’s police officers, Baltimore experienced terrible riots. … Continue reading
Posted in Baltimore, Politics, Satire, Uncategorized
Tagged Baltimore, Battle Monument, Dorothy Hamill, Freddie Gray, fried Oreos, holiday lighting, Maryland National Guard, Michael Phelps, Mount Vernon Place, National Aquarium, National Katyn Monument, riots, Walter's Art Gallery, Washington Monument
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Still Over the Moon for Caribou
I am not one to believe that a person grieves, gets over, and moves on. For me, the loss of a loved one sends shock waves through my system that can linger for a lifetime. Such are my feelings concerning … Continue reading
Posted in Baltimore, Food and Drink, Satire, Uncategorized
Tagged Artifact, Caribou, Charmington's, Dooby's, Farrah Fawcett, Jaclyn Smith, latte, latte liberal, Mustang, Panera, Peet's, Spro, Starbucks, venti, York Road
4 Comments
Fiddler on the Tomb: MHS Picks a New Poe Toaster
When the Maryland Historical Society (MHS) announced they would be taking proposals to choose a new Poe Toaster and holding a competition in the manner of American Idol and America’s Got Talent, I was excited to see what my fellow … Continue reading
Let’s Keep Our Skies Open to Drones
My friend and financial advisor, Ellis Wyatt III, who I am pleased to relate, has recovered nicely from the hate mongering he endured after the 2008 financial crisis, tells me he’s got a new issue on his radar. In the … Continue reading
Posted in Science and Technology, Uncategorized
Tagged copter, drone, Ellis Wyatt, financial crisis, joystick, Martha Stewart, Towson Mall
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New Poe Toaster will be Show Star
As an acolyte of Edgar Allan Poe and someone without much to do in the evenings, I’ve spent the past nine years, on the anniversary of Poe’s birthday, January 19th, waiting outside of Westminster Hall, beside the author’s grave, for … Continue reading
Posted in Baltimore, Edgar Allan Poe, Uncategorized
Tagged Halloween, Maryland Historical Society, Poe Toaster
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Capturing Fall Color
We’ve arrived at the peak of fall, and much like mold allergies and runny noses, the tumbling leaves and colors of the season are everywhere: the purple maple, the copper oak, the golden-bronze beech. With low gas prices, nature lovers … Continue reading
Posted in Science and Technology, Uncategorized
Tagged fall foliage, gray squirrel, nature photography
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Charney's Life of Charney 